On Monday night Andrew and I went to a Duran Duran show. I would love to tell you that this was a lifelong dream of mine coming true or that I have been swooning over Duran Duran since before I even knew what a tingly feeling down below meant, but that would be a lie. I am 28 years old. I was not even born when Duran Duran first had a single hit the US charts.
BUT!
I grew up with Duran Duran as my dad really did (sorry Dad but it’s true, so don’t get your Members Only jacket in a wad) embrace the 80′s. I remember that on Sundays, which were cleaning days in our house, there were always some DD jams being mimicked by me on my broom-turned-air-guitar. And– I am about to up the gross factor on this here blog by about 173%, are you ready?– my mom once told me that I was conceived to a Duran Duran song. So there’s that. I guess I felt like if there is a band who could inspire my parents to fuck (UGH DIE MENTAL IMAGE, DIIIE), and that band is still around and jamming, I probably owe it to them to go see them play.
I’m going to tell you about the show. I really am. But first I’d like to talk to you about their jackets.
THEIR JACKETS, YOU GUYS. Ugh, I had so much horrible-fashion jealousy. The keyboardist, Nick Rhodes, had this leopard print velvety blazer that I basically wanted to have sex with. And Simon was rocking this like… futuristic-looking black and red irridescent MASTERPIECE. I was only about eight rows from the stage and did many mathematical equations to the tune of “Distance from stage/Running speed(Does Simon carry a knife) = THAT JACKET IS MINE, BITCH”. Alas, Simon is a spry fellow and I didn’t want to risk it. This is what eBay is for, after all.
Back to the show. So yeah, Simon is a babe. There, I said it; I was sexually attracted to a man older than my dad. Cows would slay themselves if he used his golden voice to ask them for a steak. And he’s got moves, man! All the moves. If you recently had some moves but now can’t find them, it’s because Simon took them all. Don’t tell my boyfriend I told you this, but he’s been walking around the house for the past two days trying to perfect some fancy shoulder work he learned from Simon.
And the band as a whole was amazing. They sounded great and were full of energy and happiness. A+++ would watch again. I didn’t even spend one minute of their show wondering which song had my parents bumping ugl– OH GOD THERE’S THE MENTAL IMAGE AGAIN.
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Disclaimer: I was given two tickets to see Duran Duran with the understanding that I tell you all about it afterwards. That does not mean my thoughts on the show was paid for; all opinions are 1.) unbiased, B.) my own. You can follow Duran Duran-related posts/tweets on Twitter using the #duransocial hashtag.

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Electric Barbarella.
That’s all I need to say.
My parents told me where I was conceived. I’m *still* trying to erase that image. EESH.